The Day A Disaster Turned Out Okay

What more could go wrong? We had not rehearsed together since the last gig in September as Alex had been in the states, and then as soon as he came back Gordon had some sort of flu. So on Saturday night as I went down the stairs to check if everything was ready before the gig, I prayed nothing else would happen. The minute I walked in it was clear that the left speaker wasn't working. Alex and Darren were sweating in the dungeon changing cables and pressing keys and turning knobs. "There's no sound from the keyboard!" Darren yelled while shaking one cable and manically changing settings. "I have to let them in," I said quietly. They looked at me in despair. "We'll sort it out."

The night had started off well enough, despite the drummer being an hour and a half late and the fiasco with the amps. I told the bar staff it would be busy. They nodded. No, I mean busy, I mean call your extra staff. I knew for a fact 40 people who were coming. Then there were all the maybes. They stared at me for a minute, and grabbed the phone and started dialling desperately. Giuseppe came in. I was busy writing out set lists. I knew it was him because of the familiar squeeze of the arm and kiss on top of the head. When I saw his face it was definitely him. That's got to be a good sign, right? I know I looked pleased. He left the party early to come along early. I was delighted. We chatted a little as people started to flood in. Within minutes the upstairs was packed. Shit. Downstairs was smaller still...

The gig went fine. The first 5 minutes were pure technical problems, so I just talked and embarressed myself as usual. They all laughed. It was hot and dark, with people squashed right into the cubbyhole at the back, sitting on crates and right the way up to our feet. Unbelievable. Afterwards, there were so many to thank. Someone talked about a gig somewhere, someone else mentioned handing a CD to some record company guy. A guy from a TV production company asked me to sing on some song or other. Not bad for just our second gig, the first I actually invited people to (the last time I invited 4 people). MY boss from work told me to go for it, that this was obviously what I was meant to be doing. I don't think she meant she was going to fire me either.

Giuseppe had disappeared. I couldn't see him anywhere. Everyone was off to parties but we couldn't go because we had to get all the gear back to my house. Anyway, the last 2 weeks of sleeping little and eating even less was starting to crash down on me. We had a free bar but I only had a beer and a ginn&tonic. I asked Sven if he'd seen Giuseppe, not being able to hold my patience any longer. "Who?" he said. It turns out that though they's been talking all night and both work for the Italian team, that they didn't know each other. As if by magic Giuseppe appeared. "Where were you, I had been looking for you?" He smiled and pointed down the back where a big group of people were putting on their coats and filing out the door. "We're leaving now - to go to some club or other." I didn't hear an invite, but I think it may also have been clear that I wasn't going anywhere. In either case I was disappointed.

We managed to drag everything home and then sat a while listening to a new tune I wrote and having tea and cigarettes. Not very Rock and Roll. Over the next two weeks we have to record a CD to give to the record company guy just in case, and organise 2 further gigs. I wish I had a manager and no full-time job.

As for Giuseppe, well I don't even know if he liked the gig. Many people were raving about this and that but maybe it's just not his thing. Also his constant entourage makes it hard for me to know whether or not he needs space or needs to be chased. The last time we met for a drink was because someone else had cancelled on him. I don't want to have to chase but maybe that is what I will have to do? I rack my brains for inspiration. No, I can't think of anything. So for 2 days I have not contacted him, despite his assertion he would see me on Monday (I don't work on Mondays). So it looks like I will have to book him or wait until the 16th which is when he does his gig. He strikes me as the type who has constant attention. But then I was so sure he liked me.

What is a kiss on the head and a hug squeeze to someone you barely know?