Carpet Dude

There is a small man with a funny lip who walks around the office at night. I only see him when Julie has gone to the toilet or for a smoke. He sidles along in his green overalls, with a twiching grin on his face, but his eyes don´t smile. He stares, and if I stare back, he twists his head as he walks, or sometimes even stops and grins demonically. I don´t even know if it is his idea of friendly, but I do know my usual empathy programming fails with this man.

We all see him, cleaning the carpet, smoking, kicking the can machine, shouting at the silent phones, sweeping the ceilings(I joke not). Milling around a nearly empty building all night would probably drive anyone mad. After all, I run around screaming "Ow!"(and pointing) and "Get down y´all" and lepping off desks when I feel like it, but this guy is probably not that musical.

I suspect that there are in fact many carpet dudes, as none of us ever see him when we are with anyone else. He must be tailored specially to the fears and worries of each individual. I think that there is some company-sponsored mystery we have to complete involving this man, after which you gain promotion or something. Or perhaps he is just part of the company´s Social Work Programme...